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Humor

This tag is associated with 19 posts

New Yorkers Are People Too

” ‘ What other bands were you with, hon?’ The tired ostrich spoke slowly.   ‘I was with The Fuck Yous, and before that I was with Spontaneous Inventions,’ I spontaneously invented. ‘I knew the Fuck Yous from the Bay Area about ten years ago,’ the acoustic guitarist mentioned. Aside from her seam of holes, … Continue reading

It’s Fun To Be Bad…Sometimes

Sex is the primary subject that connects all four short stories in renowned children’s author Roald Dahl’s Switch Bitch together. Not just any sex, but for the most part frivolous in nature, at some times life-changing, in other cases mind-numbing, and in rare instances an awakening, but always fulfilling. There is also a personal journey … Continue reading

Joe In Real Life

“Joe felt that being in a cinema was as close as you can get to being in the movie. The last layer between reality and fiction. That was partly why he was so protective of preserving theatre etiquette.” A narrative that spans the course of three years and jumps from present to past to highlight … Continue reading

Dude Where’s My Car?

Sylvania, Ohio. One of the safest cities in the world. Or at least, it was. Now, it’s nearly impossible for most people to walk the streets without being attacked by bizarre flying objects. With random pieces of machines vanishing, walking proves to be the safest way to get anywhere. No one knows what is going … Continue reading

Children May Be Small, But They’re The Biggest Test Of Patience

SUMMARY When your son wakes you up at 3:00 A.M. because he wants to watch Caillou, he’s an a-hole. When your daughter outlines every corner of your living room with a purple crayon, she’s an a-hole. When your rug rats purposely decorate the kitchen ceiling with their smoothies, they’re a-holes. So it’s only natural to … Continue reading

A Vile Tale of Intersteller Shenanigans; and Voltaire Too!!!

“Life is not always figurative. Sometimes it’s relative, other times prejorative, and once in a while vindictive. Often, however, life is real – dammed real.” When I first read Candide I was amazed at how funny something so tragic could be. That was one of the first books I read that broke through some internal … Continue reading

Hey Girl, Are You From Japan? Cause You Got Anime-zing Body

“He’s this complete goon with zero imagination or creativity. He’s always sitting on my dreams and telling me to fall in line. Like I could ever be happy as a corporate lackey. Just cause he’s traded in his dreams for financial security doesn’t mean I have to. He’s like this pigeon spending his life eating … Continue reading

For All You 80’s Movie Buffs In Australia It’s Called War Of The Golden Wattles

  “For a while Fozzy rolled the word ‘home’ around his tongue tasting its texture and meaning for the first time, exploring its pros and cons and ultimately spitting it out in disgust. It struck him, like lightning strikes its target, how superficial it all was.The resolve was made to go back and reclaim what … Continue reading

It Takes a Village to Raise a Child

The presence of family is a recurring theme throughout the novel. When I say family, I don’t mean family as the government census bureau would suggest. In this novel Bernard talks of a family with respect to, how he coined it “mentee’s” or mentors throughout his life. From neighbourhood overseers, to adopted pastors found through … Continue reading

A Little Less Kerouac, A Little More Action Guaranteed

“Here is what I believe: distance is more important than time. The Earth travels about twenty miles every second. It’s easy enough to figure out = pi, our distance from the sun, three hundred sixty-five days, and there you go. Twenty miles per second.” In 2007 a husband, wife, and their son have taken up … Continue reading

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